Rants, Ramblings and General Diary of Juliana Wathen

Archive for the ‘spiritual’ Category

I Got You Babe!…..

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Without you …..I would not experience Faith

Without you …..I wouldn’t be challenged to Trust

Without you…..I would not strive to make the World a Better Place

Without you…..I would not push myself to get to the Other Side

Without you…..I would not experience Unconditional Love

I would not be who I am today without all the experiences, conditions and people that have touched my day to day life.
It truly is YOU AND ME BABE!

I love each and every one of you
Juliana

Copy Right 2013 Juliana Wathen

Keep the good times coming…..

I know…I know, where the hell have I been? Well, I’ve been living life. What you been do’in?

I hope you haven’t been waiting on me….or

Waiting on the RIGHT time to do something…..or, for the RIGHT person to do it with…..or

The RIGHT moment to do whatever the hell you THINK is gonna make you happy.

TIME is endless…our time here is not.

It has been a year since my father passed away. On the one year anniversary of his passing my sweet mother asked if I thought his life was as happy as he wanted.  I replied, “Is anybodies?”

It made me think for a while about his life. And I thought   “NO” …Though he always seemed to do what he wanted, when he wanted….I don’t believe it was as happy a life as he would have liked.

It made me think even more .Who is responsible for what we get out of life? The answer was as obvious as the dirty clothes piled on my bedroom floor.  We are….. I am.  So, I am taking ownership of my happiness. I am taking responsibility for my life and it’s outcome.

LIFE is too short to wait.

I love each and every one of you

Juliana

Copyright Juliana Wathen 2013

The Goldilocks Complex…..

I must admit. I have lived my life settling for many things that didn’t fit. I have a history of being overly agreeable. I would just deal with what was handed me and go with the flow.

I wasn’t one to complain if things were too hot or cold, too big or too small, too short or too tall. I settled in life and love.

In hindsight, I see that I was just glad to have something rather than nothing at all. What I should have done was continue to do just what Goldilocks did…..look for what was JUST RIGHT.

I’m ready to find the “JUST RIGHT” moments in my life. To do that, I have to be willing to crawl out of the bed that is too short no matter how accustomed to it I have become and put my feet on the floor. It’s time to point my feet towards the door and walk thru it.

I have 8 days of healthy eating under my belt. I deserve to feel “JUST RIGHT” about losing weight and being healthy.

I have worked hard this past year to find that “JUST RIGHT” spot in my core and make peace with myself for all the times that I have “SETTLED” in the past.

What I have discovered is that the more I allow myself to experience those “JUST RIGHT” moments the more I am inclined to pass up the ones that don’t completely fit.

Everyone deserves to be comfortable in their own skin and happy. You just have to claim it. And sometimes THAT, in itself, can make you feel uncomfortable when you struggle with self worth. The only one keeping you from realizing your own worth ….is you.

I want what Goldilocks wants. From now on, I will settle for nothing less than “JUST RIGHT” in life and love. Don’t you settle either.

I love each and every one of you

Juliana

Copyright 2012 Juliana Wathen

Going to the source…..

This is my favorite picture from my vacation in Hawaii. My final morning when I took my rental car and headed for the Road to Hana. This picture is special. I keep this picture  in a frame top box on my coffee table to remind me of what is possible.

That final morning I spotted a small state park on the left of the road at the turn off to Hana. I had been walking on beaches for 5 days, black sand, white sand  – but this one seemed different and I was compelled to find out why. I parked the car and walked past the tree line to the beach. I went to the water’s edge and took pictures of surfers and fishermen and tried to paint this last vista into my memory. I felt an incredible peace that morning. I turned to walk back to my car and saw a man clad only in a short white sarong walking towards me. He moved with great purpose and yet his feet seemed to barely disturb the sand.

His skin was golden. It glowed and the light seemed to shimmer off his shoulders. I couldn’t really tell if the source was actual sunlight or if the glow radiated  from somewhere deep within his body. And it suddenly occurred to me that I was actually questioning the source of this illumination. So I continued to watch him. There was nothing subtle about my gaze.

I stood there, transfixed on him as he walked by. He smiled and as he passed I lifted the camera to my eye and began shooting as if it was the most normal thing in the world to do. He walked away from me and up to the tree line which seemed to have a small clearing. He removed his sarong, bowed in reverence to the sun and then sat….and began his morning meditation. I just stood there…watching….this man…this master….center himself and ground his energy to the earth. He was the perfect picture of peace and I could feel it energizing my own body. I knew instantly that he knew who he was , where he had come from and where he was going.

I never forgot that moment. I had never seen anyone so peaceful in all my life, so centered and so strong in his silence.

People sometimes go to great lengths to be noticed. Whether they dress to impress or shout out loud, put stickers on their cars or wave banners in the air. The person who got my attention and impressed me the most these past ten yrs has been the man – who walked by and said absolutely nothing.

I wanna be like him.

I love each and every one of you

Juliana

Copyright 2011 Juliana Wathen

Set Sail…..

There will come a day when I will go unseen and unknown. No forwarding address, no email or phone number.  It is the fate of all that have come before me and the waiting legacy of all who come after me. Few have the chance to choose the when, where or how. And no one can predict who will be there to hold our hand or if we will even get that final goodbye. If you have lived your life honestly and shared your love with all those that mattered along the way then when, where and with whom won’t matter. There will be no words left unspoken and no amends left unmade.

Life is meant to be lived. Live it to the fullest.

Life is meant to be loved. Find your passion.

Life is meant to be shared. Keep the doors to your heart open.

Life is simple – people are complicated, love makes it all worth while.

When my days on earth are through set my ashes adrift on the waves between the islands of Molokai and Maui.

Take the sailboat out of Lahaina Harbor and let the hum of the engine take you to the edge of the land mass. Cut the engine and have faith. The trade winds will whip around the end of the island and fill your sails. The boat will pitch to the side and you will find yourself moving with a purpose, sailing across the most incredible blue water you have ever seen with a grace you have never experienced before.

This is where I will be. There, with spinner dolphins and hump back whales, filled sails and a setting sun. This is life…this is love… THIS is where you will find me.

I love each and every one of you

Juliana

Copyright 2011 Juliana Wathen

 

 

Don’t give up the ship…..

One of the greatest assets we can possess is HOPE. Hope gives us the ability to move forward, to see ahead through the storm and on to clearer days and calmer seas.

It tells us “we can” when others, including ourselves, say “we can’t”. Hope is that small seed that propels us into the future. It is the spark that ignites our dreams. It is the fuel that carries us through the darkest hours and most difficult circumstances. It carries us through to the finish line.

Hope is the passion behind every smile you see every day of your life. It nurtures and molds our ability to love unconditionally and lays the foundation for our faith. It makes us who we are.

Without HOPE  there is no future or direction.

There are challenging days ahead for some folks and I have only these words to share with you as they were shared with me tonight.  Don’t give up the ship.

Never give up HOPE. I’ll lend you some of mine if you need it. I now have plenty to share.

I love each and every one of you and today I love the Acker Family  just a little bit more. We are sending you light, love and plenty of hope.

Juliana Wathen

Copyright 2011 Juliana Wathen

Seasons change…..And so do I…..

There is this incredible moment ….a moment so hard to go back and pin point that you might as well not even try. A moment you just accept  as having happened as soon as you become AWARE of it.

The AWARENESS comes well after the MOMENT.

I sat today as I drove between jobs and tried to think…was it yesterday? …the day before? Or Monday….was it Monday??? I had to laugh to myself. The “WHEN” and “HOW” really mean nothing in the grand scheme of things. It’s the end results  that matter.

Like many, I have actively struggled with negative feelings, fears and phobias for years. I have struggled to let them go and purge them from my daily existence. I worked to let go of anger and I’ve prayed to be released from the stranglehold of unhealthy emotions. I have read books and done meditations to find that peaceful place where these things can no longer touch me.

Through my studies I have discovered that you can say the words, even with conviction, like “I forgive you”, “I am worthy”…or “I’m not in love this person anymore”…but it is something else  entirely to believe it and live it. The elusive goal is to no longer feel anger in the back of your throat when you speak a name, to no longer feel a longing in your heart when you hear the name of another or fear a situation. And ultimately, to gather yourself in confidence and move on without regret.

I had that moment today…that AWARENESS moment when I realized that the season in my life had changed and I wasn’t just ready to move on but that I already had. I felt no attachment to the past and the bag of rocks I had left beside the road somewhere along the way. I couldn’t even tell you how many miles back I had dropped the burden. I was just AWARE of traveling lighter.

With that lightness today came a joy that had been missing in my life for a long time. It’s was like welcoming a new season…rejoicing in the falls first cold front to break the oppressive heat of a dry Texas summer. There is a crispness in the air, a  lightness in my step and I know that Christmas is just around the corner. Life is a gift…sometimes it even has a bow on it!

I love each and every one of you

Juliana

Copyright 2011 Juliana Wathen

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