Category: humor

Life is like a drawer of fried chicken…..

Forest Gump almost had it right – POLITICIANS are like a box of chocolates…you never know what your gonna get. So instead of standing on my soap box today and preaching I just want to make an impassioned plea to your stomach to consider what the world  looks like thru my eyes. LIFE….AN IDEAL LIFE….

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I shaved my legs for this?…..

It’s hard to believe that there is an unflattering side to losing weight. But there is! And NOBODY, I mean NOOOOOBODY warns you about it. Now, before you go getting your granny panties in a twist, I’m not talking that 10 lbs of “Water Weight” you think you are retaining. I am talking about losing

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Who you calling short?…..

So when you drop a ton of weight, one of the drawbacks is on your pocket-book. You gotta buy new clothes some time! On Tuesday evening I made my pilgrimage to my local favorite fat store. I scoured through the racks of brightly colored summer offerings searching for what had quickly become an elusive and

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The Perfect Fit…..

It was bound to happen…and I can blame it all on that thing called “CHANGE”. They can warn you all day long about the mental and physical changes that come about after Gastric By-Pass surgery. But I think they are a bit too clinical and don’t really prepare you for reality and the things that

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Getting Hit by a Beer Truck….

So my mom asked me, “Are you getting excited honey?” About what mom?..”Well, your surgery.” ( I’m having gastric by-pass tomorrow) Mom, really? That’s like asking me if I’m excited I’m about to be hit by a beer truck at full speed!…. No, I am not EXCITED about surgery. I am scared and anxious and

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Mornings SUCK!……

MORNING PERSON?…….NOT!!!!…Anyone who has ever met me will testify in open court that I am NOT , nor have I ever been, a “morning person”. You know the type. They spring out of bed with an annoyingly perky smile on their face and a obnoxiuos song in their heart. It would never occur to them

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Defensive Driving……

Okay – It can happen to ANYBODY. I got a speeding ticket in Bertram, Texas so I had to take Defensive Driving…I choose an on-line class because my schedule is just too unpredictable. The thought of spending 6 hours in front of my computer did NOT thrill me. But it had to be done. I

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Piano Bar Blues……

Yes, Mrs. Lincoln, I have had a cocktail tonight and how did you enjoy the play? “Fine Mrs. Kennedy – how was the parade? Okay…I had WAY to much fun working tonight. Work turned into unexpected play which is the BEST kinda play to have. I am perched up on the 18th floor of a

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Love Spell…..

I admit. It ain’t easy being me. LIFE is simple, it’s just not always easy. And there in lies the rub. I’m not talking about the annoying RUB that happens when you forget to wear your bicycle shorts under your skirt either. You know what I am talking about, some of us have issues. Especially in this 110

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