So my mom asked me, “Are you getting excited honey?” About what mom?..”Well, your surgery.” ( I’m having gastric by-pass tomorrow) Mom, really? That’s like asking me if I’m excited I’m about to be hit by a beer truck at full speed!….
No, I am not EXCITED about surgery. I am scared and anxious and could puke my shoes at the drop of a hat.
I tried to think last night when was the last time I felt so unsettled and uncertain. It was January this year. Opening night of Diary of a Mad* Fat*Woman. I was so scared I was sure I would throw up back stage before I went on.
When I REALLY thought about it I was a lot more scared that night than I am now. I was afraid of failing and sucking in general. I was putting my life out there in every detail for everyone to judge. And you know what? I did it. I made it through and it was life changing.
So I will expect no less tomorrow as I put my life out there one more time.
I’ll see you on the other side…..and it will be life changing.
I love each and every one of you.
Copy right Juliana Wathen 2012